Denial: You can’t undo what’s done!

Insanity is thinking that you can go back to being who you once were before life “broke” you. You can try and put the pieces back together, but it’ll just never be the same. Don’t deny your “past”, accept it!

We sometimes think we were better before, but one undeniable fact about the human race is that we change for the better. Yes, we occasionally make things worse but we evolve. All change is necessary and ultimately vital to enable us to move forward. It’s sometimes painful and unpleasant, but vital!

Perhaps you’ve lost certain morals, you’ve developed new habits that you’re not too pleased with. Perfectly understandable. Although doing away with certain habits may be good, doing away with that “new you” isn’t.

There’s a reason life pushed you down a certain path. There’s a reason you became someone else; something else. Embrace it! Try and understand why, face it! Don’t run away from it or try to burry it.

Someone once told me, “Your messed up-ness may just be what someone needed.” I felt that. I came to later realize how true that was. One of the biggest problems is opinions. We all have them. We’re all entitled to them. But as I said, it’s a problem! Why?

Because we tend to think our opinions make more sense than that of others. We want people to be a certain way that makes sense to us. We want them to look a certain way, dress, speak, act, pray, f*ck, you name it!

This has caused a lot of confusion and self-conflict in many people. My advice is, don’t let someone’s opinion dictate how you feel about yourself. Introspection is just as important as perception. In simple terms, what you think is equally as important as what others think.

We were all brought here, no one came and set things to be a certain way, we’re all trying to figure things out. No one knows it all, and that’s ok. Listen to guidance, learn from others, but don’t be a slave to them!


Letting go?

Letting go… Easier said than done, right? How does one simply leave behind their life’s work? After pouring out your heart and soul entirely on something or someone, how do you just flick the switch and leave it all behind?

How can you restart? How can you rebuild? It’s almost impossible seeing as there’s not much left to give after giving your all. Not many can relate because not many are, quote unquote, dumb enough to put all their eggs in one basket.

I was one of those “dumb” people. I could tell you my whole story but that’s just it, it would be a story to you because you won’t be able to comprehend how serious my loss is. You just can’t fathom the agony the experience has caused.

Here I lay, pondering on the thought of bowing out. Why? You may ask.. Because I’m convinced there’s really nothing left to give. I’m just a shell of a man now. Empty, envious and angry!

Angry at myself, angry at the world. Yes, no one asked me to bend over backwards and break, but I did it anyway. No one asked me to invest all my time and efforts in any endeavor, but I did. Like a shattered glass, no matter how the pieces are put back together, it will just never be the same.

The damage is done! The price must be paid. For I can no longer bare, to live with this shame. Tis my desire, that hope I can reclaim, but if I’m being honest, things will stay the same. So for me, I believe it’s the end of the game.


Social Media

A place to broadcast a lie

Looking successful, with no need to try

Not made in China but it’s still fake

Your life, it can break, but also make

All dependent upon choices

With lots of overwhelming voices

You see what we want, not what’s real

Because good, is all we want to feel

Fake it till you make it is what they say

Following the trend seems to be the only way

Modern day slavery, AKA social media

It’s it real life, just someone’s idea

Freedom ?

You are free to make your own choices in life, but you aren’t free from the consequences…”

Don’t cry if you date a player & get played

Just like having a baby after getting laid

In life all the dues get paid

So today I see Bella Thorne trending because she’s crying about the backlash from choosing to leak her own nudes instead of allowing a hacker to extort her.

Firstly, I started something I call the “woken” philosophy, which as the name implies; is a philosophy: A philosophy in layman’s terms is simply an idea.

The woken philosophy is based on the idea that life is yours, no one else’s and it’s meant to be lived. We have different definitions of what it means to live. But, overall, for every action there is an inevitable outcome. Sometimes good, sometimes bad.

I’m not here to pick sides or say what’s right and wrong or tell people how to live. I always emphasize that I’m not a life coach. That word makes me sick! No one ought to tell you how to live. I’m not here to defend or attack anyone for what they decide to do in their lives.

Let me get to the point because no matter how much this is emphasized, society pays attention to what it wants to; often the bad, messy sides of things. I don’t really care about that so anyway…

Bella took pictures of herself. “Nudes”. It’s her body, it’s her right. Now, as a celebrity she’s at risk of being attacked by hackers. Perhaps she knew, perhaps she didn’t. But that’s life. Today celebrities wear revealing clothing. People go for “nice” shoots where they’re basically naked. No one is blowing up about it.

It’s really funny to me though. But the bottom line, things don’t always get the same reaction. There are things Rihanna gets away with that apparently not everyone can. Like when having sex, even with a condom, there’s a chance of the occurrence of pregnancy.

Mommy and daddy tell you not to have sex before marriage, maybe you decide to. Maybe you get pregnant, maybe you don’t. Either way, if you made the choice to do something, no mater how well intentioned, be prepared to deal with the consequences.

I’m writing this right now when there are people taking sides to it even from a racial standpoint, “Black Whoopi” vs “White Bella”. And perhaps because I’m a “nobody” right now, no one will pay enough attention to this, but either way, even if they do, I’m prepared to deal with whatever consequences arise from writing this post.

I won’t let anyone tell me what I should or shouldn’t do. This is not to say I won’t heed a warning or take sensible advice into consideration, but overall I always decide to make the decision I can live with the most.

There isn’t anything objectively bad or good. There’s no “right” or “wrong” choice. It’s a journey, not a test. It’s like someone telling you to abort a baby because keeping it will ruin your life, maybe it will, maybe it won’t. Either way, whatever you decide, don’t blame anyone. Deal with it! It’s all on you!

Yes! It’s their fault you decided to make the choice. Perhaps their advice was wrong, but you still made the decision. No one cares and it won’t matter why you made the choice, bottom line is the choice was made. It’s your life, you have to live and deal with it.

~Woken Philosopha


I don’t know about you but I’m not religious

Like courtroom facts it’s mostly fictitious

Licking their chops like it’s something delicious

I believe in Christ but that’s a relationship

Being loyal even through hardship

Taking me higher than any spaceship

One step at a time, like climbing a ladder

Takes away my burden so I don’t get sadder

Comforts me before I can even get madder

All about love and not looking for faults

Having nothing to hide so no need for vaults

They don’t get it, I’m not saying they’re dolts

But why be pretentious when you’re heading toward doom

Burdened by your perils and feeling the gloom

Yes he’s coming, we’ll keep saying soon

For He is the Lord, our salvation

Doesn’t judge, nor does he look at your nation

Everyone is welcome, even a Haitian

We can’t do enough good that’s why we have grace

He left us early to prepare a place

No more shame you can show your face

Being alive is not having a life

We claim to see when we’re actually blind

Speaking good, yet have bad in mind

That mentality is broke

It’s nothing but a joke

Being too careful to actually live

Holding on too tight we can barely even give

Always wanting more, that’s what we call greed

Taking what you want and more than you need

What’s the point when it won’t matter when you’re dead

This is all a lie, all made up in your head

Afraid to be great because of what people will say

So in the end, the same we stay

Slaving for desire and eventually expire

In modern terms we slave till we retire


We just know people..

Dealing with so many emotions right now I don’t even know whether I should be self pitiful or angry. I just feel so overwhelmed!!

I have so many “friends” who are there physically but not when it matters. I’m around “happy” people. There are good vibes all around but I feel so empty and alone around them. So what then is there really to it?

It’s actually kind of funny to realize most of us don’t have friends, we just know people. We have acquaintances and associates, that’s it! We don’t have people who are there when it matters or people who actually care. They may be present physically, but absent where it matters most. So again I say, knowing people isn’t having friends!

They say, “Don’t isolate yourself” but is it really better to be around people who make you feel more alone when you’re around them than when you’re on your own?

Madness! That’s what perfectly describes this. It’s been almost a year now and I’m still struggling to find a way to cope with all this. The emotions feel heightened, the pain feels magnified, everything just hurts.

I really thought I could regain happiness, re find a sense of belonging. But the more I try to find that lacking unity, the more pain I open myself up to. It just all hurts so much !!

So what then, should I do? Be a depressed loner or a depressed socialite? Don’t get me wrong, I love being around people but not at the expense of my peace of mind. Why be around people who make you feel more alone?